COVID Creeps: The Crazies (1973)

If you’re anything like us, you really haven’t been in the Christmas mood lately. With pretty much the entire world on lockdown right now thanks to COVID-19, we decided to stretch outside our comfort zone a bit and discuss a movie more relevant to current events. Crossing a couple of the obvious ones off the list, we finally landed on George A. Romero’s 1973 cult classic THE CRAZIES!

A military plane has crashed outside of Evans City, PA. The payload: an experimental bioweapon codenamed “Trixie”. This man-made virus turns people into murder-obsessed crazies, and the army arrives to lock down the town before the virus can spread. Can our plucky band of survivors escape town before military goons catch them? Can top scientists create a vaccine before the president decides to nuke the entire town? Could there possibly have been a more stressful film for us to watch right now???

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Episode 96: Jack Frost (1979)

Winter has finally arrived in our little pocket of the world, friends, and so on this episode we dive into the Rankin/Bass tale of Jack Frost! There are many Jack Frosts in the world, but this is the only one that features steampunk horses, climate-induced poverty, and a knight of King Arthur’s Round Table who has a summer cottage somewhere on the Eurasian Steppe.

This is a very…strange cartoon. So strange, in fact, that Jack Frost clearly wasn’t cool enough to carry this thing on his own, so they introduced a groundhog voiced by Buddy Hackett. That’s right! Star of Disney’s The Love Bug, Buddy Hackett!! Wow!

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Stocking Stuffer #21: Seinfeld, “The Pick”

It’s February, and by now you’ve probably put away all your decorations and lights and all that fun stuff. You’ve also probably accumulated a fair number of Christmas cards that you’ve either stashed or trashed. And that’s what we want to talk about today, with “The Pick”, the first of Seinfeld‘s two holiday episodes. “The Pick” finds Elaine agonizing over a Christmas card that features some unfortunate nudity, among other subplots that have little-to-nothing at all to do with Christmas.

…Listen, we really just wanted to talk about Seinfeld this week, alright? Also this episode eventually veers into King of the Hill chat, and the subject of Hank Hill’s plumbing. You’ve been warned. Anywho, we’ll be back with a regular episode before you know it!

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Episode 95: Klaus

Welcome to season six of Christmas Creeps! It’s hard to believe we’ve been doing this for so long, but there are lots of Christmas movie still to discover and we have no plans of stopping now!

Niall Flanagan and Dwayne Moloney, cohosts of the Secret of the Sailor Madness podcast, join us once again to discuss the handmade charms of the Netflix original film Klaus! The film tells the story of Jesper, a young postal worker sent to the farthest reaches of Scandinavia. With the help of a reclusive toymaker named Klaus, Jesper accidentally gives birth to the Yuletide legend of Santa Claus. The film was even nominated for an Academy Award for Best Animated Feature, so consider this our 2020 Oscar Special!

On top of being a unique spin on a well-worn tale, Klaus delivers a welcome return to the tradition of hand-drawn animation, and when you put three animation nerds in a room together, what you get is a whole lot of gushing! So sit back, grab yourself one of those leftover Christmas beers, and join us as we break down Klaus!

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Episode 94: The King of Kong: A Fistful of Quarters

Merry Christmas everyone! It’s time once again for our annual “July at Christmas” episode, where we take a break from Christmas to discuss something equally near and dear to our hearts: Obnoxious jingoism! And also video games! Inspired by our discussion of Four Christmases, this year we turn our attention to one of our favorite sports documentaries.

The King of Kong: A Fistful of Quarters isn’t just a film about competitive Donkey Kong. It examines what drives and obsesses men to lie, cheat and con their way to victory. Billy Mitchell can cling to a high score for twenty years through sheer cult of personality, but what happens when Steve Wiebe, a legitimate contender, emerges to challenge his record? How far will one clique go to keep potential newcomers away? And how can such an attitude rot a community from the inside out? These are the questions King of Kong grapples with, and we hope you’ll join us as we discuss all of it!

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Stocking Stuffer #20: Cranberry Christmas

Happy December to one and all! This week on the podcast, we present to you a Stocking Stuffer we recorded back in August. J5 went digging around the Lost Media Wiki and turned up Cranberry Christmas! This is an animated special sponsored and produced by the Ocean Spray cranberry juice company, featuring songs and narration from the one and only Barry Manilow! To our knowledge it has aired only once, and as this podcast bears out, there is probably a very good reason why.

This episode takes a weird turn into pitching Christmas specials sponsored by other corporate entities, and whether or not Cranberry Christmas could have stood to be a little bit more craven in its ambitions. Also in this episode, Joe and J5 read a listener email and wish Santa would bring them more. Enjoy!

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Episode 93: The Long Kiss Goodnight

Another Thanksgiving has come and gone, and that can only mean one thing… It’s time for our third annual Shane Black Friday!

Libby Cudmore joins us to help navigate all the bizarre twists and turns of Renny Harlin’s 1996 action yarn The Long Kiss Goodnight. National treasure Geena Davis plays a recovering amnesiac who suddenly, violently discovers her former life as a trained assassin, and Samuel L. Jackson plays the low-rent detective helping her get to the bottom of things. There are explosions and gunfights and it’s all very silly. Also it’s a Christmas movie. Shane Black wrote this, so of course it’s a Christmas movie!

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