To take the edge off the cloying feel-badness of Christmas Shoes, this week we’re talking about Danny Boyle’s Millions, a film that also features a precocious kid, dead parents, God, Jesus and Christmas, but is at least halfway bearable and doesn’t make us want to claw our own eyes out.

Also discussed in this episode:

• The fact that Karyn has seen neither Alien nor Dredd nor Robocop
• A guide to recognizing your saints
• The legality of destroying currency while tampering with railways (psst, it isn’t)

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WHERE DOES THIS WEEK’S FILM FALL ON THE KRANKOMETER?